A heart spills forth

Chile in a Word: Cariño

Caring, caressing, expressing, loving, warmth, besos, worried inquiries, “don’t forget to bundle up”s, kisses on the cheek, extra uvas on the plates, another blanket on the bed, a little longer hug, lingering palm to palm, and good night to you, too.

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I live in a world where a white-collared man can preach my salvation in the same instant that another man in the shadows can whistle in appreciation of my sexuality. A stray dog amongst millions can sit stoic and patient, awaiting the oncoming bus with the air of an old man who has done this many more times than he can count. But that clinking box of green and white just whizzes right on past, and the mangy mutt, unblinking, awaits the next. Gazing through those bustling windows, I roll about town with my family of strangers, living in grays, mutes, and white-noise. Suddenly, rounding the bend I look down into the city center at sundown and the traffic signals are positively smoldering with light. The city is gilded in gold and, at once a child in attics of old, I am discovering a treasure.

Gems of another glitter can be found in that same cramped, jostling city bus; recovering from a headache and clutching my weary backpack to my chest, I’m suddenly joined by a mother and two children who are juggling a potted plant and trying to arrange themselves in the bustling vehicle. Eyeing the verdure perched on her lap, I catch the mother’s glance, and a conversation is sparked. A sort of warmth effuses through the atmosphere. Several laughs and a good many smiles later, my headache is gone and my stop has arrived. A kind man seated in front of us, having overheard me mention where I'd need to hop off, thoughtfully warns me that the time has come for me to descend. Hands and voices reach out when I drop my scarf in the aisle –and I feel blessed. Within moments, I have moved from being that solitary foreigner on the bus to feeling myself at the heart of a small family –one where you help without it being expected of you. Where you exchange a smile in passing and look out for everyone as a whole. We at the front of that bus, we achieved something enviable, nay, precious in those few instants. All it took was an open eye and a few words.


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But what have I been doing these last few weeks? Obviously not keeping up on my blog as much as one might hope. Well, I made a weekend trip to Mendoza, Argentina, delved deeper into my artistic self, came to know a few musician friends, and buckled down on my course work, which has picked up, thankfully. I have felt myself re-becoming that creative person that I love so much, channeling that special energy through art classes, song writing, poetry, and dance. A friend is starting me off on Chilean folk songs as he teaches me the guitar and my personal modern-dance pieces have been well appreciated by someone other than my own shadow for the first time in recorded history. And Robert was a very good audience, I might add.

I have planned out my entire pre-med track and triumphed in planning my class schedule for next semester. I’ve played in compost bins at my internship, kissed the sky a hundred times, spoken with Robert infinitely more, and procrastinated long and hard on my Chinese test preparation. Hence, it is my time to leave you, although this post deserves much more than what I have given.

May love be with you wherever you go.

Peace and love,

Jocelyn